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Steven Wright soundboard

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You always take his side, Ma. You always liked him..
You always take his side, Ma. You always liked him.. Roblaster
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No, Phil, he's not all right.
No, Phil, he's not all right. Roblaster
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Now we got a special situation right now.
Now we got a special situation right now. Roblaster
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Right. Any movement on the Walter Brennan thing?
Right. Any movement on the Walter Brennan thing? Roblaster
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That's a joke, right? I get it.
That's a joke, right? I get it. Roblaster
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Yeah, and my mother is a werewolf, right?
Yeah, and my mother is a werewolf, right? Roblaster
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All right. What have we got here?
All right. What have we got here? Roblaster
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Possibly, but... Marion's the least of your worries..
Possibly, but... Marion's the least of your worries.. Roblaster
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Fire her up! Right in the middle!
Fire her up! Right in the middle! Roblaster
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Everybody say gook, but it's all right.
Everybody say gook, but it's all right. Roblaster
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It's just down the hall. It's in the right.
It's just down the hall. It's in the right. Roblaster
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The United States has no right to give...
The United States has no right to give... Roblaster
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